THE NEEN TRIBUNE IS PROUD TO PRESENT A BRAND NEW SPONSOR, 

 

 

 

KEENO’S

ORIGINAL

HOT N’ SPICY MUNCHY MIX

 

 

ARE YOU TIRED OF YOUR FRIENDS CALLING YOU A WUSS BECAUSE YOU CAN'T HANG WITH THE HOT STUFF ?

WELL, PROVE THEM ALL WRONG !

AND ORDER A TRUCKLOAD TODAY !

AND

WE'LL THROW IN AN EXTRA JAR FOR FREE !

HURRY BEFORE THIS SPECIAL ENDS

 

HEAR WHAT THESE SATISFIED CUSTOMERS HAVE TO SAY :

Harry Hellapainyo  -  Best stuff since sliced chicharro-nes !

La Victoria Principal  -  Ain't nothing like it in Dallas !

Tommy Tabasco  -  Damn near had to chase it down with a case of Corona ! 

T.O. Tapatio  -  Ay cauvrone !  Mucho chiloso !

Wally Wasabi  -  Those rice crackers was the best part !

Wandking  -  I could hang, as long as I have some cold water close by !

 

ARE YOU CONVINCED ?  ORDER NOW AT

1-800-OOHWEEE

 

 

We had the privilege of interviewing Mr. Keeno about his product. We are glad that he took the time from his busy schedule to give us some history about the world famous Hot n' Spicy Munchy Mix. This is an excerpt :

 

Trib  -   How did you get the idea to develop this product ?

 

Mr. K.  -   I was conducting a laboratory experiment in my garage. It was the study of the after effects of street purchased  Cannabis Dimebagus and the repercussions and  cravings caused by the inhalation thereof, that results in the devouring of anything edible.

 

Trib  -   What did you learn from the scientific experiment ?

 

Mr. K.  -  I got the munchies

 

Trib  -   How did you come up with the original recipe ?

 

Mr. K.  -  Well after my experiment, I went into the kitchen and found some chex cereal. Then I asked  myself  " Got milk ? " I looked in the fridge and there was none to be found. The closest thing I had to a dairy product was some moldy cheese. Then I said to myself " Hmmm ... Yo quiero .." just then I spotted some packets of Taco Bell hot sauce ( the Fire variety ) then I squeezed it all over the cereal. Then I jumped for joy and started singing " Hold the pickles and the lettuce ... cause I'm having it my way ... cause I deserve a break today ! " Then I said to myself that I was thinking that maybe I talk to myself too much. Then I asked myself if I really said that to myself today, cause it feels like deja vu all over again, or is it I thought. Then I thought that maybe I was just a little paranoid or maybe it was just good stuff. Ayway I lost my keys and couldn't remember where I put them. So I like backtracked in slow motion, then I said " Far out " cause a groovy song by The Grateful Dead was playin' on the 8 track and I was trippin' to " Truckin' " then .....

 

Trib  -  THE MUNCHY MIX !!   WHAT ABOUT THE MUNCHY MIX !!

 

Mr. K.  -  Oh yeah, I forgot. What was the question ?

 

Trib  -  I asked you about the original recipe

 

Mr. K.  -  Yeah right.  Anyway, After I put the hot sauce on I didn't know if I wanted to try it. Then I said to myself  " I know, let Mikey try it !  He'll try anything. Lo and behold he liked it !  he liked it !!  So that's how it all got started, I have made some improvements since then by adding nuts, pretzels and rice crackers. The rest is history.

 

Trib  -  We have heard that besides the 150 herbs and spices, you have some special secret ingredients. Would you care to tell us about them ?

 

Mr. K.  -  If I told you they wouldn't be a secret, would they ? But there are a few ingredients that I will reveal. Some rare ingredients are, dried mocoserenatol, fortified toejamanol, sniffing gluetamate, and Pairabens dirtysox stock for that extra flavor. 

 

Trib  -  Thank you, for your time.

 

Mr. K.  -  You're welcome, I think.

  

                                  

 

 

REMEMBER, CHICKENS MAY BE NUGGETLESS

AND PLANTERS DO HAVE NUTS !

BUT WHEN IT COMES TO HOT N' SPICY

KEENO'S KNOWS !