Dedicated
to

Esperanza
Aquino
Aug 9, 1921
Sept 24,1983

Front Page

 

 

In Today's Tribune

Dyl's Going Away Party Pix! 

Click on cake to see pix
 

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In Today's Tribune

 Don't Forget Dyl's Going Away Party! 
 
Saturday June 15th @ Tony and Robin's House

Festivities start at 2 pm. Bring your choice of beverage and your favorite dish or dessert.

Jesus' Prayer For Us 
- Its in today's Outlook

Are You Caught Up In Fettuccine Frenzy? 
-Republished by public demand.....

Can You Talk The Mom Talk? 
-Can you perpetuate the myths?

 

 

 

Introducing Aquinohotline's New Chef.

The Son of Benito Musselinguine

 

 

The Chef's Recipe (which has been handed down from generation to generation)

 

 

 "To-Die-For" Chicken Fettucine

 

Pop quiz: Can you talk the mom talk? 

By Sandy Hingston

How good a job are you doing of perpetuating those all-important Mom myths? Civilization as we know it depends on passing this info on to future generations — so find out how you score! 

1. Sitting three inches away from a TV set will make you go blind. True or false? 
A. True
B. False 

2. Your 6-year-old daughter is a terribly picky eater. The best thing to say to her as she refuses once again to touch the dinner you’ve so lovingly prepared is: 

A. Hillary Clinton always eats her carrots. 
B. Don’t you want to grow up big and strong like Mommy? 
C. Don’t you know that children in India are starving? 
D. Carrots will give you curly hair! 


3. According to infallible moms everywhere, which of these is true: 

A. Shaving your legs before age 16 will give you a hairy body by age 20. 
B. Spending too much time in the bathroom will make your hair fall out. 
C. Dating boys with tattoos equals early death. 
D. All of the above. 


4. Your 13-year-old daughter has announced her intention to get her navel pierced. When you heatedly object, she counters: “But Marjorie McEcklesley has hers pierced!” Your next move: 

A. Marjorie McEcklesley is a cheap little slut. 
B. I don’t care about Marjorie McEcklesley; I care about you.
C. Do you want to give your father a heart attack? 
D. If Marjorie McEcklesley jumped off a bridge, would you jump off, too? 


5. Which of the following causes zits? 

A. Fried foods 
B. Chocolate
C. Makeup 
D. All of the above 


6. Going outdoors with wet hair on a chilly day causes colds. True or false? 

A. True
B. False 


7. Your daughter is playing basketball with her team. She makes a brilliant steal, heads down the court for a fast break in absolute solitude, and trips and falls. What do you do? 

A. Scream at the ref: She was FOULED! She was FOULED!!! 
B. Smile at her and say, Too bad! Better luck next time! 
C. Halt the game while you go onto the court to make sure she hasn’t suffered a concussion. 
D. Nothing. She’s always mortified when you acknowledge her existence. 

 

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In Today's Tribune

 You All are Invited!   
- Submitted by Tony & Robin 

A Special Girl
- Tribune Exclusive

What and Where is Montezuma's Castle? 
-Ben and Christine will take you there!

News & Pollitick's from Stokes County N.C.
- submitted by the Californian Confederate

Mood Ring!   
- Do you want to get her in the mood?
  Submitted by the Perrfessor

 Photo Gallery-Fetucine Feast!   
- Testing out the new Aquinohotline Camera 

 Exclusive from Skorpio!   
- Solar eclipse Monday afternoon 

 

Going Away Party

 

 

The Tony and Robin are inviting all of you to:

Dylan's Going Away Party
Saturday June 15th @ Tony and Robin's House

Festivities start at 2 pm. Bring your choice of beverage and your favorite dish or dessert.

Come on down and give him a rousing bon voyage!

 

 

 

A Special Girl

Do you remember this photo? It was taken by Pilip. It was used to inform our readers to the identity of "The Perfesser"

The caption read, "...Here he is with one of his very special Special Education students Alanah.

 

 

We forgot to mention how special Alanah was.

On Wednesday, May 22nd 2002 at Lone Hill Middle School, San Dimas CA, Alanah Aquino was given an " Award of Excellence",  acknowledging her achievement in obtaining a PERFECT 4.0 GRADE POINT AVERAGE! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Congratulations Alanah!
You truly are a "very special student"

Alanah and her friend, Lauren Cowles

 

What and Where is Montezuma's Castle? 
-Ben and Christine will take you there!

If you have ever traveled abroad you know that Montezuma's Revenge is NOT a video game designed to entertain children. Poor Montezuma has been blamed for intestinal disorders for as long as most of us can remember. But a castle on a cliff and a nearby well in the Upper Sonoran Desert of Central Arizona's Verde Valley also bear his name. Montezuma's Castle is well known among tourists who exit Interstate 17 on their way north to the Grand Canyon. But few Montezuma Castle tourists are familiar with the park's counterpart-- Montezuma's Well. The "well" was first brought to the general public's attention by Richard J. Hinton in his Handbook to Arizona, published in 1878. It is believed that the first white visitor to the area was the Spaniard Antonio de Espejo on his 1583 expedition. In his journal he describes an abandoned pueblo with a ditch running from a nearby pond. It is thought this was Montezuma's Castle and Well. Early settlers to the area concluded that the stately cliff dwelling belonged to the Aztec emperor Montezuma. Actually, the "castle" was home to the Sinagua -- not the Aztecs -- and was deserted nearly a century before Montezuma was born..  Head-on view of Montezuma's Castle. Montezuma never lived in the castle named after him nor did he drink from the well's waters. Cliff dwellings at Montezuma's Well. Montezuma's Well is a sinkhole, a collapsed underground limestone cavern filled with water. More than a million gallons of water a day flow continuously, providing a lush, verdant oasis in the midst of surrounding desert grassland. Montezuma's Well is 368 feet across and 55 feet deep; it sits at an elevation of 3,618 feet. Locating the source of the well's water has researchers baffled. Tests using gas and dye have been performed, but so far, no connection has been established between the well's water and any other water source in the area. For trivia lovers, in May 1948, the U.S. Park Service used scuba equipment for the first time ever, to explore Montezuma's Well. Christine at Montezuma's Well. Note the cliff dwellings to the left on the side of the hill. The well is a unique ecosystem with several plants and animals found nowhere else on earth. There are leeches, amphipods, water scorpions and turtles that live in this closed ecosystem. This remarkable habitat is perhaps due to the receiving and the discharging of large quantities of warm water (76° F) that enters through underground springs, keeping the environment within the well very stable. Due to the high concentration of dissolved carbon dioxide, 600 times higher than most natural aquatic environments -- it affords unique conditions for scientific studies of plant and animal interactions not found anywhere else. This rich supply of dissolved CO2, hence lack of oxygen, has precluded many aquatic animals from living in these waters, especially fish. The terrestrial vegetation that occurs around the rim of the well includes juniper, Arizona Sycamore, Arizona Walnut, Acacia, Velvet Mesquite, Velvet Ash, Cliff-rose, Brittlebush, Salt Bush, Creosote Bush, Desert Broom, Spanish Dagger and the exotic Joint-fir, Ephedra (Mormon tea). Wildflowers abound. They include Lambs Quarter (Globemallow), Indian Paintbrush, Gray Thistle, Penstemon, Pale Evening-primrose, Prickle Poppy, Jimson Weed (Sacred Datura), Milkvetch, Yellow Columbine, Hedgehog, Englemann's Prickly Pear and Maidenhair Spleenwort. During the winter, the well is a stopover for various waterfowl. It's not uncommon to see American Wigeons, Coots, Mallards, Ruddy ducks, Cinnamon Teal, Gadwalls, and even an occasional Canada Goose. During the spring or summer you may see an abundance of native or visiting feathered friends. including the American Robin, Roadrunner, Red-tailed Hawk, American Kestrel, Great Horned Owl (this is a year-round resident that lives in the well's inner walls), Common Raven, Belted Kingfisher, Black Phoebe, Canyon Wren, cardinal, Gambel's Quail, Gila Woodpecker, Great Blue Heron, Lesser Goldfinch, Mourning Dove and Red-Shafted Flicker. Native wildlife include the Arizona Grey Fox, porcupine, beaver, chipmunk, cottontail rabbit, Javelina, skunks and the White-Tailed Deer. Snakes inhabiting the area are the rattlesnake, bull snake and gopher snake. Lizards such as the Collared Lizard abound. The well empties into Beaver Creek, a trickle during drought years and a torrent during wet years. These unpredictable weather conditions may have contributed to the appearance and disappearance of two distinct desert cultures, the Hohokam and the Sinagua. Both irrigated their crops with the well's waters. Oddly, Sinagua is a Spanish word that means "without water."  Christine at Beaver Creek Native peoples started living in the region about 2000 years ago. The Verde River and Beaver Creek -- two principle waterways in the Verde Valley -- ebb and flow as the seasons change. So it was with native peoples. They arrived, lived and cultivated, then after several hundred years seemingly vanished overnight. Why? Archeologists speculate that drought, exhausted soil, disease, or wars with marauding bands may have contributed to their disappearance. Whatever the reason, they left their dwellings in the same condition as they had inhabited them. It is easy to imagine what it was like for these early inhabitants hundreds of years ago, because the National Park Service has done an excellent job of preserving its original look and feel. We can peer into the past and get a sense of what life was like a thousand years ago. Archeologists suspect that the first permanent settlers in the valley were the Hohokam, a Pima word for "all used up." These resourceful farmers arrived in the area around 600 AD and lived in one-room houses made of poles, sticks and mud. These specialized structures are not found among other prehistoric Indians of the southwest. They irrigated their crops of corn, beans and squash from cracks in limestone rocks which carried water from Beaver Creek and the sinkhole we call Montezuma Well. About 1070 AD some of them left the valley. A typical Hohokam pithouse is on display and was constructed approximately 1100 AD. The decidedly different Sinaguan dwellings here vary in size from large pueblos of 55 rooms (Montezuma's Castle) down to one-room dwellings. The Sinagua were peaceful village dwellers. They are believed to have arrived in the valley about 900 AD, and the well supported a community of over 200 Sinagua until 1400 AD. Visitors to the site can still see traces of ancient lime encrusted irrigation ditches from past farming activity. One classic example is seen in the visitors picnic area. The Sinagua lived in open areas and were primarily farmers. They augmented their diet by hunting and gathering. The Verde Valley supplied them with more than the basics. There was abundant water, fertile bottom lands and ample game -- including deer, antelope, rabbit, bear, muskrat, turtle and duck -- to complement a diet that depended on corn. The Sinagua were also skilled craftsmen. They formed stone tools such as axes, knives, hammers, and manos and metates for grinding corn. They also crafted bone into awls and needles, wove beautiful garments of cotton, and fabricated ornaments out of sea shells, turquoise, and local stone -- argillite -- for personal adornment. The last known native peoples to inhabit the Montezuma Well area were the Western Apache. Two small caves at the well show signs of Apache occupation, sometime after 1800. Montezuma Well is a detached unit of Montezuma Castle National Monument located approximately 11 miles to the south. Take Exit 293 from Interstate 17 and drive four miles. There is a one-third mile self-guided loop trail to the rim of the sinkhole and other trails to the lake. These trails are not recommended for wheelchair use. A lush, shaded picnic area is also located at the well. Montezuma Castle and Well were established on December 8, 1906 as a National Monument. They were purchased on April 4, 1947, by the National Park Service, which has maintained them since that date. Added Photos           The redhills of Sedona  Primitive natives of Arizona.......oops, wrong natives. Never mind.

 

Mood Ring
submitted by the Perfesser

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mood Ring

My husband bought me a mood ring 
the other day. 

When I'm in a good mood it turns green. 

When I'm in a bad mood, it leaves a red mark on his 
forehead. 

 

News and Pollitick's from Stokes County N.C.

King, Stokes County, North Carolina
News and Pollitick's

This week there was a new Newspaper that came out The Stokes News. It has taken the place of Two News-Paper in the Rounding area, " King Times And The Danbury Reporter."

This Weeks Head Lines 

Walnut Cove, N.C man found dead in the King, N.C Mayor's office by the Mayor of Walnut Cove, N.C

The Honorable Reid (Doo-Lord) Picklestown. He is the Son of the Primitive Baptist church Preacher and The Old lady down the street here in town and local Bootlegger for many years until he got caught and when he went into court he promised that he would go down a straight and narrow road if the court would have mercy on him and they should since the lord has already forgiven him for it.

The dead man hasn't been identified as of late yesterday, but they say the man shouldn't have been in the Mayor's Office. His remains will be sent to Walnut Cove, N.C. for disposal.

This paper will come out every Thursday of the week, you can subscribe to it for $36.00 per year and it will come to your Door Step.
Well at least to your Mail Box.

Ralph G. (Stonewall) Tuttle Sr.

 

Photo Gallery-Fetucine Feast!   
- Testing out the new Aquinohotline Kamera 

Editors note:
Our publisher finally signed the expense budget! As it turned out we found we had a few bucks left in kitty for this fiscal year so we bought ourselves some capital equipment, a brand new 4.1 megapixel digital camera. Pilip could not believe his eyes!

Here are some of the results:

   

 

   

Partial Eclipse of the Sun Monday, June 10, 2002

by Skorpio

A partial eclipse of the sun will be visible from southern California (and most of the rest of North America) late on Monday afternoon, June 10. At the height of the eclipse the sun will seem to have a large bite taken out of it, and the sky and ground will darken noticeably. This is the last solar eclipse visible from Los Angeles until 2012.

A solar eclipse happens when the moon moves in front of the sun. In this case, the moon covers only part of the sun, and this is a partial eclipse. The sky will darken noticeably but not dramatically.

As seen from Los Angeles, the eclipse begins at 5:13 p.m., P.D.T., when the moon begins to cover the bottom edge of the sun. At this time, the sun and moon are one-third of the way up the western sky. The moon’s very slow eastward motion around the earth carries it over the face of the sun, and during the next hour it covers progres-sively more of the sun until 6:22 p.m., when the eclipse reaches maximum. Then 71 percent of the sun’s surface is covered by the moon. During the following hour, the moon slowly moves off the face of the sun, and the eclipse ends at 7:23 p.m. The sun is low and one-half hour before setting when the eclipse ends.

To view the eclipse safely, use a solar filter specially designed for sun viewing, or project the sun’s image with binoculars or a small telescope onto a white card while taking care that the optics do not overheat and become damaged. The Observatory sells the Solarama, a safe glass solar viewer that can be used to observe the eclipse with the unaided eye. A Solarama can be purchased by mail for $9.50 postpaid when shipped within California and $9.00 when shipped to the rest of the United States. [Go to <http://www.GriffithObs.org/Giftshop.html> for ordering information.] Solaramas will be sold at the Observatory from 4:00 to 7:00 p.m. on the 10th only for $7.00, tax included.

The Observatory and the Los Angeles Astronomical Society and the Los Angeles Sidewalk Astronomers will provide telescopes for safe public solar eclipse viewing on the lawn of the Observatory. This is the last astronomical event to be observed from the lawn until the Observatory reopens after a period of renovation and expansion in 2005.

This eclipse is visible from most of North America except the very northern and eastern part, most of the North Pacific Ocean, and the eastern edge of Asia. From along a narrow path that stretches across the Pacific Ocean from near Borneo to the western edge of Mexico, the moon is seen silhouetted in front of the sun in a rare “annular” or ring eclipse.

As seen from Los Angeles, maximum eclipse happens at 6:22 p.m. when 71 percent of the sun’s surface is covered by the moon.

The last solar eclipse visible from Los Angeles happened on December 14, 2001. There will not be another solar eclipse visible from Los Angeles until May 20, 2012.

 

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In Today's Tribune 

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 Good Versus Evil!   
- Submitted by Teena 

News From King, Stokes County, N.C
- Read What Stonewall Has To Say

How Hip Are You? 
-Take the Rock N' Roll Quiz

A Rock 'n' Roll Quiz
If you’ve always dreamed of belting out a rock anthem before thousands of screaming fans, then you’ll need to know your rock-music heritage. 



1. Before he became one of the most popular singers in American music, Elvis Presley worked in which of the following jobs? 
a)Short-order cook 
b)Truck driver 
c)Golf caddy 
d)Construction worker 

2. Rock 'n' roll godfather Chuck Berry was known not only for his sizzling guitar playing, rapid-fire wordplay, and high-energy performances, but also for which of these dance styles? 
a)Mashed potato 
b)Twist 
c)Duck walk 
d)Watusee 

3. What was the name of the first single released by the Beatles? 
a)"Please Please Me" 
b)"I Want to Hold Your Hand" 
c)"Love Me Do" 
d)"A Hard Day's Night" 

4. This R&B diva, known to many as “Lady Soul,” began her singing career with her father’s gospel choir in the Detroit church where he was pastor. 
a)Diana Ross 
b)Gladys Knight 
c)Tina Turner 
d)Aretha Franklin 

5. What were the names of the two musicians who played with Jimi Hendrix in the Jimi Hendrix Experience? 
a)Mitch Mitchell and Otis Redding 
b)Mitch Mitchell and Noel Redding 
c)Bobby Mitchell and Noel Gallagher 
d)Willie Mitchell and Noel Pointer 

6. Which of the following bands did not include Eric Clapton on guitar? 
a)The Yardbirds 
b)Cream 
c)The Animals 
d)Blind Faith 

7. Which founding member of the Rolling Stones left the band in 1992? 
a)Bill Wyman 
b)Keith Richards 
c)Charlie Watts 
d)Brian Jones 

8. Which film, based on an album by The Who, starred Tina Turner, Elton John, Jack Nicholson, and Eric Clapton? 
a)Quadrophenia 
b)The Kids Are Alright 
c)Tommy 
d)Pinball Wizard 

9. Which album by Paul Simon experimented with vocal harmonies from South African townships and zydeco rhythms from Louisiana? 
a)Still Crazy After All These Years 
b)Graceland 
c)Hearts and Bones 
d)Rhythm of the Saints 

10. In the 1970s David Bowie helped to define glam rock by inventing a variety of extravagant stage personalities, including which of the following? 
a)Transformer 
b)Iggy Stooge 
c)Ziggy Stardust 
d)Trash 

11. Three founding members of the band Talking Heads met while they were students at which school? 
a)Brown University 
b)Rhode Island School of Design 
c)Harvard University 
d)School of the Art Institute of Chicago 

Answers at the end of today's column

 

Subject: Jesus and Satan and a Computer Test.. 

Jesus and Satan were having an ongoing argument about who was better at using the computer. They had been going at it for days, and God was tired of hearing all the bickering. Finally, God said, "Cool it. I am going to set up a test which will take two hours and it will judge who does the better job." 

So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away. 
They moused. 
They did spreadsheets. 
They wrote reports. 
They sent faxes. 
They sent e-mail. 
They sent out e-mail with attachments. 
They downloaded. 
They did some genealogy reports. 
They made cards. 
They did every known job. 
But, ten minutes before the time was up, lightning suddenly flashed across the sky, thunder rolled, the rain poured, and of course, the electricity went off. Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse word known in the underworld. 
Jesus just sighed. 
The electricity finally flickered back on, and each of them restarted their computers. Satan started searching frantically screaming, "It's gone! It's all gone! I lost everything when the power went out!" 
Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all his files from the past two hours. Satan observed this and became even more irate. "Wait! He cheated! How did he do it??!!" 


God shrugged and said, "Jesus Saves." 

Ralph G. (Stonewall) Tuttle Sr.

May 31,2002
News From King, Stokes County, N.C

Mr. Eat- A- Door,
King, Stokes County, North Carolina was named after a man by the name of King that came to this area in the early 1700's and built a Log Cabin for himself and his family to live in and he named the area Kings Cabin, N.C.
The railroad came and built a Rail Road through the area and so he opened a Post Office in his home so they could receive mail.
(Paul Revere was dead by this time period)
People from all area's started to move into the area and the Feds came in and took over and built their own post office and changed the name to King, North Carolina. They have restored the old cabin that he built and it is located in a patch of woods near the original location and they do not charge to visit it and look around.
It seems that no matter where us Southern people go, One or two Orig-a-nations, the Damn Yankee's or the Feds want what usse'n have.
One of our War Hero's was General Stoneman, (Cousin) He held a lot of raids in order to protect us from the Yankee's.

 The people here would give him clothing, food, money and shelter and he would just take "SEX" from the women and the men folk didn't do a thing to him because he deserved it and he had a GUN.
We have progressed in such a manner we are behind ourselves. In the last two years we have found one (1) other color (Brown) to add to our other three (3) colors, (Red), (White) and (Black). Must have come from all the Desegretation and Inter-Breeding.
Note: (If this isn't what you call on the move I can't tell you what is.)

We also have a new newspaper Stokes News that will be out next week it will replace two of the local news papers that come out once a week now, the King Times and the Danbury reporter.

The Perfesser sure looks like a Kin Folk, he just isn't missing anough teeth to be one of ours is he local folk.

Them Laker boy's look like a part of a gang that I once knew 
"The James Gang"
The men at the local Bar are still protecting those Indian squaws ever time I go in the Bar they are in the back room singing!
"I am in Dixie Away, Away"

Ralph G. (Stonewall) Tuttle Sr. 

Answers to Rock N' Roll Quiz

1. The correct answer: B Truck driver
Elvis Presley was working as a truck driver when he recorded a few songs as a birthday gift for his mother at a studio in Memphis. Producer Sam Phillips, who had recently launched Sun Records, heard the tapes and gave Presley his first recording contract.



2. The correct answer: C Duck walk
Legendary performer Chuck Berry thrilled audiences at live shows by skating across the stage in a duck walk, which combined crouching, walking, and playing guitar all at the same time.



3. The correct answer: C "Love Me Do"
The Beatles released their debut single, "Love Me Do," in October 1962. It reached number 17 in the UK singles charts.



4. The correct answer: D Aretha Franklin
As a child in the 1950s, Aretha Franklin joined her sisters, Carolyn and Erma, in the gospel choir led by their father, Reverend C. L. Franklin. Her gospel roots are clear in such R&B classics as “Respect” and “Chain of Fools.”



5. The correct answer: B Mitch Mitchell and Noel Redding
In 1966, Jimi Hendrix founded the Jimi Hendrix Experience. British musicians Mitch Mitchell on drums and Noel Redding on bass rounded out the trio.



6. The correct answer: C The Animals
Eric Clapton played in a succession of ground-breaking rock bands during the 1960s, including the Yardbirds, John Mayall’s Bluesbreakers, Cream, Blind Faith, and Derek and the Dominos. He was firmly established as a guitar legend before finally launching a solo career in 1974.



7. The correct answer: A Bill Wyman
After 30 years of playing bass with The Rolling Stones, Bill Wyman left the band in 1992 and later formed a group called the Rhythm Kings.



8. The correct answer: C Tommy
The Who released their album Tommy in 1969. Conceived as a rock opera, they later performed the album at the London Coliseum and Metropolitan Opera House in New York. A film version was released in 1975.



9. The correct answer: B Graceland
Paul Simon’s album Graceland was released in 1986 to widespread critical acclaim. It was heavily influenced by Louisiana zydeco music and also featured 20 South African musicians.



10. The correct answer: C Ziggy Stardust
Among the many flamboyant stage personalities David Bowie developed in the 1970s, Ziggy Stardust was his most popular.



11. The correct answer: B Rhode Island School of Design
Lead vocalist and guitarist David Byrne, bassist Tina Weymouth, and drummer Chris Frantz were all students at Rhode Island School of Design, an art college in Providence, Rhode Island, when they formed The Artistics (also sometimes called the Autistics) in 1974. Jerry Harrison, then a student at the Harvard Graduate School of Design, joined the band in 1977, after they had changed their name to Talking Heads.